tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-906442678610585215.post6119229273398436477..comments2024-02-26T02:14:00.144-08:00Comments on TransFusion: On demisexuality, marginalization, and privilegeDr. Cary Gabriel Costellohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14478058791195474381noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-906442678610585215.post-14681920831601323752017-11-22T02:50:00.187-08:002017-11-22T02:50:00.187-08:00It's more like we need an emotional connection...It's more like we need an emotional connection to the person before we have sex(If at all we do) . If that connection isn't there we don't experience any sexual attractionsurabhi567899https://www.blogger.com/profile/17843726829365759194noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-906442678610585215.post-27338941311207131302013-06-21T14:54:42.664-07:002013-06-21T14:54:42.664-07:00This was a very interesting post. Obviously, I hav...This was a very interesting post. Obviously, I have no way of knowing whether or not the woman in question actually does or does not experience sexual attraction and in what circumstances. However, it does appear that she didn't present her self-identification as demisexual in terms of sexual attraction, so then the question is whether she was unaware of how the demisexual community (and the broader asexual spectrum) defines demisexuality, or if she was in fact appropriating it. Without actually knowing her or having observed her or heard her comment I can't speak to her motivation.<br /><br />What I do know as an asexual and from my discussions with demisexuals who are members of the asexual community is that they feel very frustrated when non-demisexuals assume that demisexuality is how this woman presented it. She may be contributing to the further marginalization and invisibility of demisexuals by presenting a misleading image of this orientation.<br /><br />I think that this is separate from the question of how one is perceived by the majority. Conditional straight privilege is an issue that many people within the LGBTQ community face. For instance, bisexual and pansexual individuals who happen to be in a relationship with a person of a different sex or gender at a given point in time often struggle with the question of what privilege they have and what they should do about it.<br /><br />Because many asexuals do not have partners and therefore do not have partners of the same sex or gender, we can also have conditional straight privilege in some situations and this is an issue that I have often seen discussed in asexual circles. Most asexuals that I know are politically progressive and generally very aware of questions about privilege and oppression. The discussions are usually pretty similar to those found in the wider LGBTQ community.Laurahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06512229215187222744noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-906442678610585215.post-28488608454906969592013-06-21T13:28:54.176-07:002013-06-21T13:28:54.176-07:00Reflecting on this post, I want to reiterate somet...Reflecting on this post, I want to reiterate something I've written about before: we always have to distinguish between *personal identity* and *material privilege*. My kid, who is mixed Asian and white, frames this clearly: only she gets to decide how she identifies--other people can't impose an identity on her based on how they read her appearance--but how people read her determines whether she enjoys privilege. Generally, other people in our area of the Midwest, where Asian folks are a small minority, "read" her as either Latina or white. It is clear to her that if she's read as white, she's generally treated much better than if she's read as Latina.<br /><br />So: a person can suffer psychologically because they identify with a marginalized group but are read as being in the majority. But when framed as being "normative" they enjoy social privilege due to how others frame them, and to deny one's privilege does a disservice to those who suffer poor treatment.Dr. Cary Gabriel Costellohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14478058791195474381noreply@blogger.com